Does everybody hate being put on HOLD as much as I do??

I’m not talking about the quick switch from one desk to another, like one window opening as another closes stuff. I’m not talking about not being proactive. And I’m not talking about sitting on your butt, expecting things to be handed to you.

I’m talking about seriously searching for answers, help, avenues of progress. You know you’ve studied, done the homework, found the right place, dialed the right number.
But for some reason, you find yourself waiting on HOLD.

I hate waiting. It’s not my strong suit. And on the occasional bad day/week/month, I feel like I’ve been on HOLD my whole life. :neutral:

Of course, there are often good reasons for being put on HOLD. Maybe you’ve got the wrong department after all. Maybe you belong somewhere else. Maybe you’re not really ready for what you’re asking for. Or maybe you’ve gotten your answer and didn’t HEAR it, because you haven’t listened to the tape carefully.

But there you are—on HOLD, listening to the 1001 String Orchestra as they play, “If It Takes Forever, I Will Wait For You…” :nonono:

And that’s what Hell really is, y’know. Being on HOLD in a tiny room with non-stop elevator music and small chunks of fruitcake the only thing to keep you going. :shock:

Purgatory? That’s when you’re put on HOLD without even the benefit of the music. Just silence. Like floating in space. You don’t even know if you’re still connected, and after a while you shout pointlessly into the phone, beginning to panic, trying to tell someone you’re still alive. You’re actually relieved when some sainted soul silently pulls the plug on you.

I can imagine the messages in my head…
“This is the Career Department. Can I be of assistance today?”
“Yes, I’m trying to find my way to a full time writing career. I’ve been working hard, sending stuff out, polishing my craft, and I’ve got all kind of paperwork here, and—”
“Please HOLD.”

“Good morning, may I help you?”
“Yes, I’ve been on HOLD for a while now. I’ve done a lot of shopping around, and have a pretty good idea of what I want. I’ve been looking for the right man, and…”
“Please HOLD.”

“Hello, may I help—”
“Now look, I’m tired of this holding and being transferred from place to place crap. I want—”
“Please HOLD.”
Minutes pass. Hours. Eons. But it’ll be worth it if I can just reach the right place! Finally, a mechanical voice relieves me of my misery…
“You have been timed out. Thank you for your interest. Please consult us again in your next incarnation…………………”

I don’t know about you, but my gut instinct after waiting on HOLD for too long is to hang it up.

But for the moment, I’m holding the line.
For the moment.