Raine's Secret Garden


Dear Mastercard/ Visa/ CapitalOne/ Discover/ Gas Company/ AT&T/ Hospital/ AOL/ Recording Angel of Death:

I know how busy all of you are handling various disgruntled customers. And I’m well aware that English is one of the most difficult languages to learn.

I was hoping, however, that you could explain the logic of having a person who doesn’t speak English manning your Customer Service telephones.

I’m not referring to someone with a bit of an “accent”. I’m talking someone who probably recently arrived from the Zeta Reticuli binary star system. And I fail to see how it could be considered “good customer service” if your employee and I have to stop every five seconds because one of us is saying, “Huh?” or “What?”

I certainly support equal employment opportunities for all. But I don’t think you’re prepared to pay the medical bills of a financially strapped single woman who opens her statement, finds she’s been triple-charged for a repair service, and can’t get your representative to understand that she’s having a heart attack about it.


If that conversation was taped for customer satisfaction purposes, yes—I meant every word I said.

Category: Regards, Raine — Raine @ 3:50 am ·   Comments (15)

15 Responses to “PARLEZ?

  1. Bernita says:

    Sometimes I swear it’s deliberate.

  2. BernardL says:

    LOL! I guess you didn’t know Customer Service is now patterned after a story in the Bible, Raine: The Tower Of Babel. :)

  3. Melissa says:

    You should call Dell sometime then you’ll know the full meaning of frustrated. You might even have to break down and curse.

  4. Raine says:

    Sometimes I swear it’s deliberate.

    Has occurred to me too, Bernita.
    I’m planning to be very deliberate about paying that &8#$!! card off as soon as possible, too.

  5. Raine says:

    Bernard, it’s the definition of insanity!

  6. Raine says:

    Mel, I’ve heard about Dell, lol.
    Think I’ll pass. :roll:

  7. Sela Carsen says:

    I haven’t been here in way too long, Raine. And what do I find?

    You. Being brilliantly you.

    Too funny! I’ve often wondered that myself. My favorite is talking to the people at the phone company. Not only do they barely speak English, but nobody EVER works in the department you need.

    “Here, let me transfer you to …”
    No, wait! I already talked to them! They told me to talk to you!

    It’s enough to make you commit moider!

  8. vanessa jaye says:

    “I’m talking someone who probably recently arrived from the Zeta Reticuli binary star system”

    Hahahahahahahaaaa. :snortle:: I needed that. I feel your pain, hon. It’s more like Customer ‘dis’service these days…. *Sigh*

  9. shesawriter says:

    Oh, GAWD! I can empathize. Calling customer service for Dell will put you outside of the US because they out-source. Please give me someone who can understand me…AND someone I can understand. Last time I was on the phone, I ended up screaming at the person and hanging up. It was just too much work.

  10. Raine says:

    I hear ya, Sela.
    Not understanding them is bad enough—but they want you to share the love with every department in the business!

  11. Raine says:

    It’s more like Customer ‘dis’service these days…

    And that seems so ridiculous to me!
    Unless, of course, you’re so big you could give a crap less about the individual customer.
    So why bother having these departments at all?! :uzi:

  12. Raine says:

    Last time I was on the phone, I ended up screaming at the person and hanging up.

    Sure way to get a bad rep and lose customers, Tanya.
    I don’t have a Dell, but I’ve heard about their service, and it doesn’t leave me inclined to get one. :nonono:

  13. Oh man, I hate calling customer service. And if you think what you went through was bad, in Spanish is a lot worse.

  14. Raine says:

    Tempest, I believe you! :roll:

  15. Amie Stuart says:

    Not ONLY does Dell outsource OUTSIDE the country ( frankly I htink they all do), when you BUY a computer for them you have to pay EXTRA,…..EXTRA for N. American support–in other words, if you want a N. American ENGLISH as a FIRST language tech support person, ya gots to cough up the dinero, Ranchero.

    Now tell me, what’s right about that? Not an EFFING thing.